A Post by Ali

My Friend Ali had the funniest experience the other day, and since she doesn't believe in blogs (yet) we decided to post it on mine. Enjoy... it is hysterical.

They Came in Through the Bathroom Window

I’m living alone right now. One of my roommates is in San Diego and the other is in Uganda, so it’s just me at the apartment currently. I flew into Salt Lake from Africa on Monday night and am driving back to San Diego on Thursday, which means I had a whole 60 hours alone in Provo. Just 60 hours. During which I managed to spend 2 of those locked in my bathroom. Apparently the handle on the bathroom door doesn’t turn/work from the inside, only from the outside. So as soon as you shut the door, and it closes, the door is locked and it cannot be opened from inside. My roommates knew about this issue, but failed to inform me when I returned home to Provo-lucky me. This poses some problems since most of the time you’re INSIDE the bathroom, not outside of it when the door is shut. Normally this would have been funny and something my roommates would laugh about with me when they came home from class and freed me from my little white linoleum prison, except that I DON’T HAVE ANY ROOMMATES RIGHT NOW. A thought which ran through my mind as I fruitlessly tried to force the door open. So after some one on one with Heavenly Father that consisted mainly of “throw me a bone please”, I started hearing my neighbors in the apartment complex fooling around in their respective kitchens/bathrooms. It was at that point that I started banging on the walls and ceilings of the bathroom, attempting to get someone’s attention. After some time spent pounding “Jingle Bells” and “Shave and a Haircut” on the walls-so as to illustrate that the annoying pounding was not just hammering or hanging pictures-I heard the doorbell ring and my neighbors calling through the locked front door if I needed help. Why yes I did need help I screamed back, I was stuck in my freakin’ bathroom and I could not get out. A few moments later I heard a man’s voice (a strange and rare occurrence in my apartment) saying “they” were coming in to get me out and asking if I was hurt, decent, etc. To which I answered, with all the self-respect I had left, that I was peachy, just stuck. It’s very hard to sound confident and self-possessed sitting in your immodest pajamas on the edge of the bath tub, as the Provo Police (yes, the Police) climb through your bedroom window (yes the window, because I am a girl and live alone and therefore DOUBLE lock my front door when I’m home alone at night) and bust open your bathroom door. It took four of them. Four. Police Officers. None of them were laughing but I imagine they were laughing as soon as they walked out my now unlocked front door-because let’s face it was pretty darn funny.